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Keeping Sean Cononie Alive
Originally posted on Will Write For Food 2015: By Loan Le You’re not supposed to stick antibiotic capsules up your butt. You’re not supposed to drink eight to 10 cans of Monster Energy drink every day. And you’re definitely not supposed to pee 1 1/2 gallons of urine during a four-hour power sleep. But Sean…
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If I was honest about the things I did during lunch break . . .
On Facebook Mentally disliking so many statuses. Unfollowing people, but still staying friends with them Sobbing at vacation pictures On YouTube Babies laughing Bloopers of Law & Order and Criminal Minds Matthew Gray Gubler Powderpuff cheerleading dance routines. Seriously. Matthew Gray Gubler Epic trap music to abate my mid-day slump Novak Djokovic Outside Checking my phone to…
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A True Story, Part 1
A True Story W. sits alone at a table near the kitchen, and the flurry of cooks, French expletives, pots and pans in the background brings him and his stillness into sharp focus. Our eyes meet and I smother the pinprick shock I feel. I can see, even from my spot, the curl of his…
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An editorial assistant’s rejection letter to assholes online
Dear hugecock145: Thank you so much for messaging me on Tinder/Hinge/OKCupid. I’ve now had the chance to review your pick-up line/sexist comment/racist remark. I’m impressed by the time that you’d taken to relay your crude thoughts about my physical appearance. Your audacity to list the disappointing measurements of your dick is astounding. However, it is clear that…
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How to win at everything
If you’re walking home by yourself in the dark, and get cat-called by a group of men, stop. Place one hand against your ear like you’re talking into a small microphone, and say: “We got him. Send in backup.” Watch them scatter. Do you have a problem with people crowding the poles on the subway?…
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A foreign experience
I told myself I’d write about my Italy trip immediately upon my return. (I also promised that I’d update this blog more frequently. Total fail). I wanted to capture the memories before they disappeared. Every time I travel to another place, I come back feeling as if I’d fallen out of a dream—a wondrous sort…
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“Yeah, um, I don’t like to read.”
Some people might think I’m odd, but one of the first questions I might ask a stranger is what she or he is reading.
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Excerpt from a short story that might never come to life
On violence Growing up, Rebecca’s family settled things court style with her mother presiding as the impartial judge. Who had whose boyfriend over for too long? Mary. Who stole Marcia’s blouse? Mary or April. Who gets the car this Friday night? Rebecca. Her father, being second in power, was required to be at these meetings, but he would sit with his hands folded on his lap, watching…
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Obligatory New Year’s Resolutions
Yeah, I’m unique because I posted this on Jan. 2 and not Jan. 1. Happy New Year, everyone. I hope everyone finds what they’re looking for, and I hope everyone experiences the joy of stumbling across something unexpected. 2014 was hectic. I graduated from college, got a job in Manhattan, and moved way out of…
Loan Le 